18 November 2013

Turning A Transsexual Into A Lesbian

"I was surprised.  I thought you were a straight man."

So said one of my then-coworkers not long after I came out.  Other people, I'm sure, had the same reaction.  A couple of years earlier, had I met someone like me, I would have been just as surprised as my old co-worker.

It was, in fact, one of the reasons why I didn't transition sooner:  I thought that if I were really a woman, I'd feel more attracted to men.

Mind you,  I have been in relationships in men, as you know if you read some of my early posts.  But throughout my life, I have felt more attracted to women than to men.  I did not disclose this fact to some friends, acquaintances and co-workers until I'd been living as Justine for a couple of years.  

When they expressed consternation, I said something along the lines of "You've heard of lesbians, haven't you?"

Now, I know transsexual women whose feelings are similar to mine.  I know other trans women who have been attracted only to men, and others only to women.  

But I'd never before heard of a transsexual female who never had any attraction to a female before her transition or surgery, but felt such an urge afterward.  On top of that, the woman I am about to mention completely renounced men.

The woman in question is Britain's first openly transgender parliamentarian:  Nikki Sinclaire.  She revealed recently that her change in her feelings resulted from a rape she endured in London some fourteen years ago.

What's really interesting is that she fits into a narrative I heard often in my youth (but hadn't heard in a long time) :  that of the female who becomes a lesbian after a bad experience with a man.  I'll bet there are still some people who believe that's the biggest cause of lesbianism.

I'd be very interested to know what reasearchers who claim there is a "gay gene" say about this story.